Two Futures That You Might Want To Avoid

TODAY we have a couple of stories, a grim one that got nominated for several Major Awards and the other a satirical tale that deserves the same fate:

(1) "Five Views of the Planet Tartarus."

By Rachel K. Jones (Wikipedia HERE and the ISFDb HERE).

First appearance: Lightspeed Magazine, January 2024.

Reprints page (ISFDb HERE).

Short short short story (3 pages).

Online at Lightspeed Magazine (HERE).

   "Are you trying to hit all of them?"

THROUGHOUT history every culture has struggled with what to do with those who can't—or won't—conform to their society, up to and including the ultimate sanction. The culture that runs Planet Tartarus, however, seems to have come up with what could be considered the ultimate solution to that problem . . .

Main characters:

~ A prisoner, the shuttle pilot, and "the new Orpheuses."

References:

- To get the full effect of today's story, you might benefit from knowing about these:

  "Hesiod asserts that a bronze anvil falling from heaven would fall nine days before it reached the earth. The anvil would take nine more days to fall from earth to Tartarus. In the Iliad (c. 8th century B.C.), Zeus asserts that Tartarus is 'as far beneath Hades as heaven is above earth.' Similarly the mythographer Apollodorus, describes Tartarus as 'a gloomy place in Hades as far distant from earth as earth is distant from the sky'." (Wikipedia HERE.)

  "The Sibylline Oracles (Latin: Oracula Sibyllina; sometimes called the pseudo-Sibylline Oracles) are a collection of oracular utterances written in Greek hexameters ascribed to the Sibyls, prophetesses who uttered divine revelations in a frenzied state." (Wikipedia HERE.)

  "In Greek mythology, Orpheus was a legendary musician and prophet. He was also a renowned poet and, according to legend, travelled with Jason and the Argonauts in search of the Golden Fleece, and descended into the underworld to recover his lost wife, Eurydice." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Nanobots":

  "According to Richard Feynman, it was his former graduate student and collaborator Albert Hibbs who originally suggested to him (circa 1959) the idea of a medical use for Feynman's theoretical micro-machines (see biological machine). Hibbs suggested that certain repair machines might one day be reduced in size to the point that it would, in theory, be possible to (as Feynman put it) 'swallow the surgeon.' The idea was incorporated into Feynman's case study 1959 essay There's Plenty of Room at the Bottom." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "cleaning off plaques, lengthening telomeres, repairing neurons":

  "An atheroma, or atheromatous plaque, is an abnormal accumulation of material in the inner layer of an arterial wall.

  "The material consists of mostly macrophage cells, or debris, containing lipids, calcium and a variable amount of fibrous connective tissue. The accumulated material forms a swelling in the artery wall, which may intrude into the lumen of the artery, narrowing it and restricting blood flow. Atheroma is the pathological basis for the disease entity atherosclerosis, a subtype of arteriosclerosis." (Wikipedia HERE.)

  "Amyloid plaques (also known as neuritic plaques, amyloid beta plaques or senile plaques) are extracellular deposits of amyloid beta (Aβ) protein that present mainly in the grey matter of the brain. Degenerative neuronal elements and an abundance of microglia and astrocytes can be associated with amyloid plaques. Some plaques occur in the brain as a result of aging, but large numbers of plaques and neurofibrillary tangles are characteristic features of Alzheimer's disease." (Wikipedia HERE.)

  "The relationship between telomeres and longevity and changing the length of telomeres is one of the new fields of research on increasing human lifespan and even human immortality.

  "It is predicted that the knowledge of methods to increase the length of cell telomeres (stem cell and quasi-stem cells, control the regeneration and rebuilding of different tissues of the body) will pave the way for increasing human lifespan." (Wikipedia HERE.)

  "Neuroregeneration is the regrowth or repair of nervous tissues, cells or cell products. Neuroregenerative mechanisms may include generation of new neurons, glia, axons, myelin, or synapses. Neuroregeneration differs between the peripheral nervous system (PNS) and the central nervous system (CNS) by the functional mechanisms involved, especially in the extent and speed of repair.

  "The nervous system is divided by neurologists into two parts: the central nervous system (which consists of the brain and spinal cord) and the peripheral nervous system (which consists of cranial and spinal nerves along with their associated ganglia). While the peripheral nervous system has an intrinsic ability for repair and regeneration, the central nervous system is, for the most part, incapable of self-repair and regeneration. There is currently no treatment for recovering human nerve-function after injury to the central nervous system." (Wikipedia HERE.)

Resource:

- "In January 2024, Jones published 'Five Views of the Planet Tartarus' in Lightspeed. According to Jones, it began as a piece she wrote years earlier as part of a flash fiction challenge. Upon rediscovering the draft, she was able to reformat the story and compose an ending. 'Five Views of the Planet Tartarus' was nominated for the Hugo, Nebula, and Locus awards for short story." (Wikipedia HERE.)

(2) "How To Set Up Your Mourning Robot."

By Angela Liu (ISFDb HERE).

First appearance: Lightspeed Magazine, November 2025.

Short short short story (5 pages).

Online at Lightspeed Magazine (HERE).

   "Clean your robot only with the provided wipes. Be careful of grime that has collected in the eye units—this may lead to reduction in facial recognition accuracy and increased probability of accidents and unwarranted hostility."

LIFE was a lot easier when the most challenging thing we might have to deal with was setting a VCR clock . . .

References:

- "firmware":

  "In computing, firmware is software that provides low-level control of computing device hardware. For a relatively simple device, firmware may perform all control, monitoring and data manipulation functionality. For a more complex device, firmware may provide relatively low-level control as well as hardware abstraction services to higher-level software such as an operating system.

  "Firmware is found in a wide range of computing devices including personal computers, smartphones, home appliances, vehicles, computer peripherals and in many of the integrated circuits inside each of these larger systems." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "haptic":

  "Haptic technology (also kinaesthetic communication or 3D touch) is technology that can create an experience of touch by applying forces, vibrations, or motions to the user. These technologies can be used to feel virtual objects and events in a computer simulation, to control virtual objects, and to enhance remote control of machines and devices (telerobotics). Haptic devices may incorporate tactile sensors that measure forces exerted by the user on the interface. The word haptic, from the Ancient Greek: ἁπτικός (haptikos), means 'tactile, pertaining to the sense of touch.' Simple haptic devices are common in the form of game controllers, joysticks, and steering wheels." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Shanghainese"; "Mandarin":

  "The Shanghainese language, also known as the Shanghai dialect, or Hu language, is a variety of Wu Chinese spoken in the central districts of the city of Shanghai and its surrounding areas. It is classified as part of the Sino-Tibetan language family. Shanghainese, like the rest of the Wu language group, is mutually unintelligible with other varieties of Chinese, such as Mandarin." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "cultural appropriation":

  "Cultural appropriation is the adoption of an element or elements of culture or identity by members of another culture or identity in a manner perceived as inappropriate or unacknowledged. Charges of cultural appropriation typically arise when members of a dominant culture borrow from minority cultures. Cultural appropriation can include the adoption of another culture's religious and cultural traditions, customs, dance steps, fashion, symbols, language, history and music.

  "The concept of cultural appropriation has also been subject to heavy criticism, debate, and nuance. Critics note that the concept is often misunderstood or misapplied in popular and academic discourse. Others state that the act of cultural appropriation, usually defined, does not meaningfully constitute social harm or that the term lacks conceptual coherence. Critics also say that the concept sets arbitrary limits on intellectual freedom and artists' self-expression, reinforces group divisions, and promotes enmity or grievance rather than liberation." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "facial recognition":

  "Since their inception, facial recognition systems have seen wider uses in recent times on smartphones and in other forms of technology, such as robotics. Because computerized facial recognition involves the measurement of a human's physiological characteristics, facial recognition systems are categorized as biometrics. Although the accuracy of facial recognition systems as a biometric technology is lower than iris recognition, fingerprint image acquisition, palm recognition or voice recognition, it is widely adopted due to its contactless process. Facial recognition systems have been deployed in advanced human–computer interaction, video surveillance, law enforcement, passenger screening, decisions on employment and housing, and automatic indexing of images." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "paramnesia":

  "Paramnesia is memory-based delusion or confabulation, or an inability to distinguish between real and fantasy memories." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "AI Crimes Unit of the FBI":

  "Artificial intelligence provides a number of tools that are useful to bad actors, such as authoritarian governments, terrorists, criminals, or rogue states." (Wikipedia HERE.)

  "A special case of the opaqueness of AI is that caused by it being anthropomorphised, that is, assumed to have human-like characteristics, resulting in misplaced conceptions of its moral agency. This can cause people to overlook whether either human negligence or deliberate criminal action has led to unethical outcomes produced through an AI system." (Wikipedia HERE.)

Resources:

- Is it too much to expect remorse from a machine?

  "Despite his [Bender's] often immoral attitude, he has a softer side; he can feel guilt and remorse over his actions if he goes too far (even by his own standards), indicating that he is not as selfish or unkind as he appears to be. In 'Bendless Love,' Bender intends to murder Flexo in order to win the love of fem-bot Angelyne, but when Flexo gets stuck under a gigantic steel girder, Angelyne shows sorrow for him. Bender decides that her happiness is more important than his own, and ends up saving Flexo. Also, in 'Jurassic Bark,' when Bender becomes jealous of Fry's petrified dog, Seymour, he decides to throw him in magma. But when he realizes how his actions hurt Fry, Bender apologizes for his behavior and rescues the dog. In 'Godfellas,' he becomes the god of a microscopic alien race and abuses this position by commanding them to produce beer for him. When his abuse of power causes the entire species' demise, however, he cries in mourning and remorse." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- Affective computing:

  "Affective computing is the study and development of systems and devices that can recognize, interpret, process, and simulate human affects. It is an interdisciplinary field spanning computer science, psychology, and cognitive science. . . One of the motivations for the research is the ability to give machines emotional intelligence, including to simulate empathy. The machine should interpret the emotional state of humans and adapt its behavior to them, giving an appropriate response to those emotions. Recent experimental research has shown that subtle affective haptic feedback can shape human reward learning and mobile interaction behavior, suggesting that affective computing systems may not only interpret emotional states but also actively modulate user actions through emotion-laden outputs." (Wikipedia HERE.)

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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"Disguise and Misdirection"

"Again the Chameleon."

By Arthur Porges (1915-2006; Wikipedia HERE.)

First appearance: Shell Scott Mystery Magazine, August 1966.

Short short short story (5 pages).

Online at The Luminist Archives (HERE; go to text page 127).

   "I'll let him get his big, hot paws on it, then, zowie! we lower the boom."

WHAT'S most annoying about these criminals who pull off spectacular crimes is that they enjoy it too much. Equally annoying is how some cops think they can outguess and outmaneuver them, usually leading to spectacular failures. Fortunately for the thief and unfortunately for the police detective in today's story, it's not hard to guess where this is going . . .

Principal characters:

~ Lieutenant Corey, Dick Winton, Baker, Marcel, and, of course, The Chameleon.

References:

- "the Chameleon":

  "The English word chameleon is a simplified spelling of Latin chamaeleōn, a borrowing of the Greek χαμαιλέων (khamailéōn), a compound of χαμαί (khamaí) 'on the ground' and λέων (léōn) 'lion'." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "a book Napoleon or somebody wrote":

  "The Napoleonic Code (French: Code Napoléon), officially the Civil Code of the French (French: Code civil des Français; simply referred to as Code civil), is the French civil code established during the French Consulate in 1804 and still in force in France, although heavily and frequently amended since its inception. Although Napoleon himself was not directly involved in the drafting of the Code, as it was drafted by a commission of four eminent jurists, he chaired many of the commission's plenary sessions, and his support was crucial to its enactment." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "by J. Edgar Hoover":

  "John Edgar Hoover (January 1, 1895–May 2, 1972) was an American law enforcement administrator who served as the fifth and final director of the Bureau of Investigation (BOI) and the first director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI).

  "President Calvin Coolidge first appointed Hoover as director of the BOI, the predecessor to the FBI, in 1924. After 11 years in the post, Hoover became instrumental in founding the FBI in June 1935, where he remained as director for an additional 37 years until his death in May 1972 – serving a total of 48 years leading both the BOI and the FBI under eight presidents." (Wikipedia HERE.)

Resource:

- Another story in which the bad guy brazenly announces his theft before he does it is Ellery Queen's "The Adventure of the Dauphin's Doll" (Number 16 in a collection reviewed HERE).

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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Bugged!

"The White Cloud."

By Arthur Porges (1915-2006; Wikipedia HERE.)

First appearance: Shell Scott Mystery Magazine, April 1966.

Short short short story (3 pages).

Online at The Luminist Archives (HERE; go to text page 130).

   "We've got to find Professor Neal, and fast."

WHEN a very important scientist is kidnapped by a vicious terrorist group, the F.B.I. is at a loss. To their credit, though, the Feds do realize that, like that old saying about a thief being most qualified to catch another thief, it's going to take a scientist to find another scientist . . .

Main characters:

~ Sheriff Reardon, Tanner, Professor Neal, and Dr. Jacobi.

References:

- "limestone all through the county":

  "While draining, water and organic acid from the soil slowly (over thousands or millions of years) enlarges these cracks, dissolving the calcium carbonate and carrying it away in solution. Most cave systems are through limestone bedrock. Cooling groundwater or mixing of different groundwaters will also create conditions suitable for cave formation." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "a Snooperscope":

  "Parallel development [with the Germans in World War II] occurred in the U.S. The M1 and M3 infrared night-sighting devices, also known as the 'sniperscope' or 'snooperscope,' saw limited service with the U.S. Army in World War II and in the Korean War, to assist snipers. These were active devices, using an infrared light source to illuminate targets. Their image-intensifier tubes used an anode and an S-1 photocathode, made primarily of silver, cesium, and oxygen, and electrostatic inversion with electron acceleration produced gain." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Sophia Loren":

  For many years her name has been a synonym for an exotically beautiful woman.

  "Sofia Costanza Brigida Villani Scicolone (born 20 September 1934), known professionally as Sophia Loren, is an Italian actress, active in her native country and the United States. With a career spanning over 70 years, she is one of the last surviving major stars from the Golden Age of Hollywood cinema." (Wikipedia HERE.)

Resources:

- Our involvement with Arthur Porges's short fiction has been substantial; see a list beginning (HERE).

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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"Some Kind of Super-Dwarf"

"The Deadly Cherub."

By Arthur Porges (1915-2006; Wikipedia HERE.)

First appearance: Shell Scott Mystery Magazine, March 1966.

Short story (10 pages).

Online at The Luminist Archives (HERE; go to text page 118).

   "Three grand is a small price for a man's life, but many have gone for less."

IF a lawman were to put out an APB for a murderer that looks just like that little kid seen on millions of jars of applesauce, he'd be guaranteed to lose the next election, if they don't lock him up first. Yet that's where the evidence seems to point for a young and relatively inexperienced sheriff dealing with the demise of a local big shot . . .

Principal characters:

~ James Travis Manion, Gus Miller, Mrs. Tabor, Danny Bowen, and Lloyd Pearson. 

Typos: "the Texas was rumored"; "the Texas signed".

References:

- "the Mohave desert":

  "Named after the indigenous Mohave people, it is located primarily in southeastern California and southwestern Nevada, with small portions extending into Arizona and Utah.

  "The 54,000 square mile desert supports a number of human activities, including recreation, ranching, and military training. The Mojave Desert also contains various silver, tungsten, iron and gold deposits.

  "The spelling Mojave originates from the Spanish language, while the spelling Mohave comes from modern English. Both are used today, although the Mojave Tribal Nation officially uses the spelling Mojave, which is a shortened form of Hamakhaave, an endonym in their native language, meaning 'beside the water'." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "a handicapper":

  "Handicapping also refers to the various methods by which spectators can predict and quantify the results of a sporting match. The term is applied to the practice of predicting the result of a competition, such as for purposes of betting against the point spread. A favored team that wins by less than the point spread still wins the game, but bets on that team loss." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "the hare against the tortoise":

  "'The Tortoise and the Hare' is one of Aesop's Fables and is numbered 226 in the Perry Index. The account of a race between unequal partners has attracted conflicting interpretations. The fable itself is a variant of a common folktale theme in which ingenuity and trickery (rather than doggedness) are employed to overcome a stronger opponent." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Goliath against David":

  "According to 1 Samuel, Goliath challenges the Israelites to best him in single combat. David, then a young shepherd, takes up the challenge and kills Goliath with a stone slung from a sling. The narrative signifies King Saul's unfitness to rule for not taking up the giant's challenge himself." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Harold the Saxon against William the Norman":

  It was one of those battles that change history.

  "The Battle of Hastings was fought on 14 October 1066 between the Norman-French army of William, Duke of Normandy, and an English army under the Anglo-Saxon King Harold Godwinson, beginning the Norman Conquest of England." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "his magpie instinct":

  This slur on a noble bird species may stem from an 1817 opera by Rossini:

  "La gazza ladra (The Thieving Magpie) is a melodramma or opera semiseria in two acts by Gioachino Rossini, with a libretto by Giovanni Gherardini based on La pie voleuse by Théodore Baudouin d'Aubigny and Louis-Charles Caigniez. The Thieving Magpie's overture uses snare drums to evoke the image of the opera's main subject: a devilishly clever, thieving magpie." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "use moulage":

  "It is sometimes necessary at a crime scene to make a cast of footwear or tire mark impression in soil. Plaster of Paris can be used to make a quick-drying and -setting cast of an impression. This preserves the mark for later examination by a forensic scientist. Although there are proprietary casting materials available, Plaster of Paris is sufficient." (WikiHow HERE.)

- "the hyoid bone":

  "Due to its position, the hyoid bone is not easily susceptible to fracture. In a suspected case of murder of an adult, a fractured hyoid strongly indicates strangulation. However, in children and adolescents, where the hyoid bone is still flexible as ossification is yet to be completed, strangulation is less likely to fracture the hyoid." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "a hairless orang":

  "They are covered in long reddish hair that starts out bright orange and darkens to maroon or chocolate with age, while the skin is grey-black." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "enough hair for all four Beatles":

  In 1966 they were front page news.

  "Their hairstyle, unusually long for the era and mocked by many adults, became an emblem of rebellion to the burgeoning youth culture." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "not exactly a Dr. Thorndyke"; "prefer Freeman to the Gunsel-and-Gonad School":

  "Dr. John Evelyn Thorndyke is a fictional detective in a long series of 21 novels and 40 short stories by British author R. Austin Freeman (1862–1943). Thorndyke was described by his author as a 'medical jurispractitioner': originally a medical doctor, he turned to the bar and became one of the first — in modern parlance — forensic scientists. His solutions were based on his method of collecting all possible data (including dust and pond weed) and making inferences from them before looking at any of the protagonists and motives in the crimes. Freeman ensured that his methods were practical by conducting all experiments mentioned in the stories himself." (Wikipedia HERE.)

  "Dr. Richard Austin Freeman MRCS LSA (11 April 1862–28 September 1943) was a British writer of detective stories, mostly featuring the medico-legal forensic investigator Dr. Thorndyke. He invented the inverted detective story (a crime fiction in which the commission of the crime is described at the beginning, usually including the identity of the perpetrator, with the story then describing the detective's attempt to solve the mystery). This invention has been described as Freeman's most notable contribution to detective fiction." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "the hands of a cherub, so to speak":

  "In the 1430s and 1440s, Donatello made many sculptures of young children dancing, as well as putti (cherubs) and a variant of these traditionally called spiritelli ('imps' or 'sprites'). Putti were not new in Italian sculpture but were given a rather unusual prominence by Donatello." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Donatello":

  No, not the teenage mutant turtle.

  "Donato di Niccolò di Betto Bardi (c. 1386–13 December 1466), known mononymously as Donatello, was an Italian sculptor of the Renaissance period." (Wikipedia HERE).

Resource:

- Arthur Porges's "Seeds of Death" recently shared the spotlight with Fredric Brown's "See No Murder" (HERE).

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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"She Looked Asleep, but We Couldn't Wake Her"

TODAY we depart from our usual practice of highlighting stories that are readily available online somewhere to highlighting one that presently only resides inside a dead-tree publication, to wit:

"The Suspension of Mickey Hackerstein."

By Arthur Vidro.

First appearance: Mystery Most Traditional - Malice Domestic Number 17, 2023.

For sale (HERE).

Short story (14 pages).

   "I read a lot. Especially Christie, Queen, Sayers, Gardner, Grafton, Lovesey—"

   "Who are they?"

   "Never mind."

SHERLOCK HOLMES informed Watson that he had written a monograph about "the ashes of various tobaccos." The (very amateur) sleuth in today's story has almost certainly never read Holmes's treatise (who has?). Fortunately, as it turns out, she won't need any expert advice from the Sage of Baker Street to solve a killing that happens within just a few feet of where she works . . .

Main characters:

~ Mickey Hackerstein (the narrator), James Carr, Jedediah Gilroy, Teri Nelluc, Officer Calvey, Chuck Nelluc, Sergeant Salem, and the "beefy police sergeant."

References:

- Holmes's monograph:

  "The fictional detective Sherlock Holmes was an expert in the study of cigar ash and wrote a monograph, Upon the Distinction Between the Ashes of the Various Tobaccos, about it. This expertise was used in his cases such as A Study in Scarlet, The Boscombe Valley Mystery and The Hound of the Baskervilles." (Wikipedia HERE.) (Also see Chris Lansdown's essay HERE and The Victorian Web HERE.)

- "Mickey Mantle":

  "Mickey Charles Mantle (October 20, 1931–August 13, 1995), nicknamed 'the Mick' and 'the Commerce Comet,' was an American professional baseball player who played his entire Major League Baseball (MLB) career (1951–1968) with the New York Yankees, primarily as a center fielder. Mantle is regarded by many as being one of the best players and sluggers of all time. He was an American League (AL) Most Valuable Player three times and was inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame in 1974." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "some stringers":

  "In journalism, a stringer is a freelancer who contributes writing, photos, or videos to a photo agency, news agency, or other news organization on an ongoing basis but is paid individually for each piece of published or broadcast work rather than earning a fixed salary. Stringers include journalists, photographers, or videographers.

  "As freelancers, stringers do not receive a regular salary and the amount and type of work is typically at their discretion. However, stringers often have an ongoing relationship with one or more news organizations, to which they provide content on particular topics or locations when the opportunities arise." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "the paste-up artist":

  "Paste up is a method of creating or laying out publication pages that predates the use of the now-standard computerized page design desktop publishing programs. Completed, or camera-ready, pages are known as mechanicals or mechanical art. In the offset lithography process, the mechanicals would be photographed with a stat camera to create a same-size film negative for each printing plate required." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "like Joseph Wambaugh":

  "Joseph Aloysius Wambaugh, Jr. (January 22, 1937–February 28, 2025) was an American writer known for his fictional and nonfictional accounts of police work in the United States. Many of his novels are set in Los Angeles and its surroundings and feature Los Angeles police officers as protagonists. He won three Edgar Awards, and was named a Grand Master by the Mystery Writers of America." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "my Chevy Citation":

  "The Chevrolet Citation is a range of compact cars that was produced by Chevrolet from the 1980 to 1985 model years. The first front-wheel drive Chevrolet, the Citation replaced the Chevrolet Nova as the automaker downsized its compact cars." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Virginia Slim cigarette":

  "Philip Morris introduced Virginia Slims on July 22, 1968 and marketed the brand as a female-oriented spinoff of the company's Benson & Hedges brand. The blends, flavorings, color scheme and overall marketing concepts closely followed the Benson & Hedges model." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "a Winston":

  "Winston was introduced in 1954 by the R. J. Reynolds Tobacco Company and quickly became one of the top-selling cigarette brands, using the slogan 'Winston tastes good like a cigarette should.' It became the number one cigarette sold in the world by 1966, a position it held until 1972 when Marlboro overtook the brand." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "to watch Picket Fences":

  "Picket Fences is an American family drama television series about the residents of the town of Rome, Wisconsin, created and produced by David E. Kelley. The show ran from September 18, 1992, to June 26, 1996, on CBS in the United States." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "playing Good Samaritan":

  "The term 'good Samaritan' is used as a common metaphor: 'The word now applies to any charitable person, especially one who, like the man in the parable, rescues or helps out a needy stranger'." (Wikipedia HERE.)

Artwork by Rembrandt van Rjin

- "instant Sanka":

  "Sanka is a brand of instant decaffeinated coffee, sold around the world, and was one of the earliest decaffeinated varieties. Sanka is distributed in the United States by Kraft Heinz." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "either second-degree murder or manslaughter":

  "Generally, second-degree murder is an unplanned homicide caused by actions you knew or should have known could lead to the victim’s death.

  "Getting into a sudden fight and battering a person to death could be an example of second-degree murder. You may not have planned to get into a fight. However, if you should have known your attacks could be deadly, it may be second-degree murder.

  "The difference between first and second-degree is the mental state or mens rea. Even if you didn’t have the intent to take a human life, extreme indifference to serious bodily harm is enough to hold you accountable for the death of another person." (LawInfo HERE.)

 "The definition of voluntary manslaughter under federal law is the unlawful killing of a human being upon a sudden quarrel or heat of passion. Typically, this means that the defendant had no prior intent to kill.

  "Voluntary manslaughter is a lesser-included charge of murder. So, when a prosecutor brings a murder charge, the jury can find the defendant guilty of voluntary manslaughter without the prosecutor having to bring those charges." (LawInfo HERE.)

Resources:

- Arthur Vidro is, of course, the genial Editor-in-Chief of that superlative detective fiction magazine, (Give Me) That Old Time Detection, which we have occasionally run across (a comprehensive list starts HERE). He is also the author of "The Ransom of EQMM #1" (HERE).

  We now return you to our regularly scheduled programming.

The bottom line:

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"Suspect? I'm the Least Suspicious Man Alive. I'm Merely Being Tidy."

IT'S that joyous, festive season again, the perfect time for . . .

"Death on the Air."

By Ngaio Marsh (1895-1982; Wikipedia HERE; the GAD Wiki HERE; Mike Grost's megasite HERE; and the IMDb HERE) with technical advice from A. Drummond Sharpe.

First appearance: The Grand Magazine, February 1937.

Many reprints:

  Ellery Queen’s Mystery Magazine #50, January 1948

  Ellery Queen’s Mystery Magazine (Australia) #32, February 1950

  Ellery Queen’s Anthology #16, 1969

  Ellery Queen’s Mystery Jackpot, 1970

  Grande Dames of Detection, 1973

  Masterpieces of Mystery: The Grand Masters Up to Date, 1979

  Murder for Christmas, 1982 (covered in a review HERE)

  Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine, Mid-December 1984 (today's text)

  Masterpieces of Mystery and Suspense, 1988

  English Country House Murders, 1988

  Murder for Christmas Volume II, 1988

  The Collected Short Fiction of Ngaio Marsh, 1989

  The Oxford Book of English Detective Stories, 1990

  The Collected Short Fiction of Ngaio Marsh (var. 1), 1991

  'Death on the Air' and Other Stories, 1995

  Murder Under the Christmas Tree, 2016

  A Surprise for Christmas and Other Seasonal Mysteries, 2020

  Classic Christmas Crime Stories, 2023.

Novelette (26 pages).

Online at Archive.org (HERE; go to text page 120).

   "On the 25th of December at seven thirty A.M. Mr. Septimus Tonks was found dead beside his wireless set."

CHIEF DETECTIVE-INSPECTOR Roderick Alleyn and his crack detective team solve the HOW of this one three ways from Sunday—but as for the WHO and the WHY, that's going to take a little longer . . .

Principal characters:

~ Septimus Tonks (deceased), Emily Parks, Chase, Mr. Hislop, Guy Tonks, Dr. Meadows, Arthur, Phillipa, Isabel Tonks, Chief Detective-Inspector Roderick Alleyn, Inspector Fox, Curtis, and Detective-Sergeant Bailey. 

References:

- "his wireless set":

  Universally known as "radio" nowadays. Septimus was probably listening to the BBC at the time of his . . . departure.

  "The British Broadcasting Corporation came into existence on 1 January 1927, and Reith – newly knighted – was appointed its first director general. To represent its purpose and (stated) values, the new corporation adopted the coat of arms, including the motto 'Nation shall speak peace unto Nation.'

  "British radio audiences had little choice apart from BBC's programming approach. Reith was viewed as taking a moralistic approach as an executive, aiming to broadcast 'all that is best in every department of human knowledge, endeavour and achievement,' and putting the programming in moral or ethical terms, advocating 'a high moral tone' as 'obviously of paramount importance.' Reith succeeded in building a high wall against a more tabloid, free-for-all in radio aimed at merely attracting the largest audience (and advertising revenue). There was no paid advertising on the BBC; all the revenue came from a tax on receiving sets. Highbrow audiences, however, greatly enjoyed it." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Galvanized":

  "Galvanization (also spelled galvanisation) is the process of applying a protective zinc coating to steel or iron, to prevent rusting. The most common method is hot-dip galvanizing, in which the parts are coated by submerging them in a bath of hot, molten zinc." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "If it's electrocution":

  "Electrocution is death or severe injury caused by electric shock from electric current passing through the body. The word is derived from 'electro' and 'execution,' but it is also used for accidental death.

  "The term 'electrocution' was coined in 1889 in the US just before the first use of the electric chair and originally referred to only electrical execution and not other electrical deaths. However, since no English word was available for non-judicial deaths due to electric shock, the word 'electrocution' eventually took over as a description of all circumstances of electrical death from the new commercial electricity." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "tuning his hurdy-gurdy":

  Alleyn is speaking metaphorically, of course.

  "The hurdy-gurdy is a string instrument that produces sound by means of a hand-cranked rosined wheel which rubs against the strings. The wheel functions much like a violin (or nyckelharpa) bow, and single notes played on the instrument sound similar to those of a violin. Melodies are played on a keyboard that presses tangents—small wedges, typically made of wood or metal—against one or more of the strings to change their pitch. Like most other acoustic stringed instruments, it has a sound board and hollow cavity to make the vibration of the strings audible." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "turned his torch":

  We colonials call it a "flashlight."

  "A flashlight (North American English) or electric torch (Commonwealth English), usually shortened to torch, is a portable hand-held electric lamp. Formerly, the light source typically was a miniature incandescent light bulb, but these have been displaced by light-emitting diodes (LEDs) since the early 2000s. A typical flashlight consists of the light source mounted in a reflector, a transparent cover (sometimes combined with a lens) to protect the light source and reflector, a battery, and a switch, all enclosed in a case.

  "The invention of the dry cell and miniature incandescent electric lamps made the first battery-powered flashlights possible around 1899." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Like Dr. Johnson perhaps?":

  From childhood, Samuel Johnson struggled with money problems. See Wikipedia (HERE).

- "Bakelite knobs":

  "Bakelite was one of the first plastic-like materials to be introduced into the modern world and was popular because it could be molded and then hardened into any shape.

  "Because of its electrical nonconductivity and heat-resistant properties, it became a great commercial success. It was used in electrical insulators, radio and telephone casings, and such diverse products as kitchenware, jewelry, pipe stems, children's toys, and firearms." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "The odd wisp of blotting paper":

  "Blotting paper is a highly absorbent type of paper used to absorb ink or oil from writing material, particularly when quills or fountain pens were popular. It could also be used in testing how much oil is present in products. Blotting paper referred to as bibulous paper is mainly used in microscopy to remove excess liquids from the slide before viewing. Blotting paper has also been sold as a cosmetic to aid in the removal of skin oils and makeup." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "perhaps it was D.T.'s":

  "Delirium tremens (DTs; lit. 'mental disturbance with shaking') is a rapid onset of confusion caused by withdrawal from alcohol. DT typically occurs 48–72 hours after the last use of alcohol and symptoms last 1–8 days. Typical symptoms include nightmares, confusion, disorientation, heavy sweating, elevated heart rate, and elevated blood pressure. Visual, auditory, and tactile hallucinations are also common. DT can be fatal, especially without treatment." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "the Radio Times":

  "Radio Times is a British weekly listings magazine devoted to television and radio programme schedules, with other features such as interviews, film reviews and lifestyle items. Founded in September 1923 by John Reith, then general manager of the British Broadcasting Company, it was the world's first broadcast listings magazine. In September 2023 it became the first broadcast listings magazine to reach and then pass its centenary." (Wikipedia HERE.)

- "Heavier flex from adapter to radiator":

  "A power cord, line cord, or mains cable is an electrical cable that temporarily connects an appliance to the mains electricity supply via a wall socket or extension cord. The terms are generally used for cables using a power plug to connect to a single-phase alternating current power source at the local line voltage (generally 100 to 240 volts, depending on the location). The terms power cable, mains lead, flex or kettle lead are also used. A lamp cord (also known as a zip cord) is a light-weight, ungrounded, single-insulated two-wire cord used for small loads such as a table or floor lamp." (Wikipedia HERE.)

Resources:

- About this story, Mike Grost writes:

  "'Death on the Air' (1939) is a short story concentrating on a 'death-trap' that kills a victim. In this it recalls Overture to Death (1939). The trap in 'Death on the Air' is so technological that the story qualifies as Scientific Detection. Marsh goes into detail about the trap, showing the police gradually reconstructing how it works, a step-by-step process that involves observation of clues and detailed analysis. Marsh also offers a detailed account of the killer's activities setting the trap up." (A Guide to Classic Mystery and Detection HERE.)

- Over the years another supersleuth, Hercule Poirot, encountered several Christmas bafflements, including a locked room problem (HERE).

- Ngaio Marsh's Overture to Death caught our attention twelve years ago (HERE).

The bottom line:

A powerful medium in its heyday.

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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"Home for the Holidays"

"Home for the Holidays."

By Douglas Shimizu (ISFDb HERE).

A poem (1 page).

First appearance: Polar Borealis, May 2022.

Online (HERE; go to page 18).

   "How did I get on the naughty list?"

Sometimes it's all too easy.

Resources:

- Here is Douglas Shimizu's FictionMags list (pm = poem; ss = short story):

• Special Delivery, (pm) Polar Borealis April 2020
• Floater, (pm) Polar Borealis September/October 2020
• Blues, (pm) Polar Borealis May 2021
• The Experiment, (pm) Polar Borealis August/September 2021
• Rocketman Down, (pm) Polar Starlight October 2021
• Home for the Holidays, (pm) Polar Borealis May 2022
• Timelines, (pm) Polar Starlight May 2023
• Hometown Retreat, (ss) Polar Borealis January/February 2024
• Cheese Ball, (pm) Polar Borealis July/August 2024.

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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