"It Has Been an Interesting Little Problem, Colonel, but Elementary"

"Mr. Sherlock Holmes in the Case of the Drugged Golfers."

By Bertram Atkey (1880-1952; Mike Grost's megasite HERE; the GAD Wiki HERE; RGL collection HERE; ISFDb HERE; SFE HERE; Roy Glashan's Atkey bibliography HERE).

Reprinted in The Armchair Detective, Spring 1982.

First appearance: Fry's: The Outdoor Magazine, November 1909, in the series "Great Men and Golf."

Short short story (9 pages).

Online at Roy Glashan's Library (HERE).

   "It was almost possible to hear that great brain grinding as it worked, swiftly, surely, relentlessly, to the solution of the problem."

HOW in the world could something this big, this conspicuous, vanish in front of a roomful of people at dinner? "It was a gem-studded drinking cup fashioned from a tiger's skull, and had long been the envy of every member of the club," says the social secretary of the Blameshot Golf Club. If you're even slightly familiar with golf club members, you shouldn't have any trouble working it out . . .

Main characters:

~ Sherlock Holmes ("He was thinking—that flawless, pitilessly logical mind was dissecting, as with a pork-butcher's knife, weighing, as with a cheesemonger's scales, the case upon which we were working"), Dr. Watson ("Holmes, here is a madman coming!"), Colonel Cleak ("And now, Mr. Holmes, we want you to find the cup"), as well as the waiter ("a tired-looking man, with a very pale face and a curious look of regret in his eyes"), a coachman ("Abso-lutely, sir"), and an Indian cook ("It might have been a dream, he thought").

References and resources:

- "the fully loaded hypodermic syringe":

  Was Holmes an addict? He would likely deny it:

  "Sherlock Holmes took his bottle from the corner of the mantel-piece, and his hypodermic syringe from its neat morocco case. With his long, white, nervous fingers he adjusted the delicate needle, and rolled back his left shirt-cuff. For some little time his eyes rested thoughtfully upon the sinewy forearm and wrist, all dotted and scarred with innumerable puncture-marks. Finally, he thrust the sharp point home, pressed down the tiny piston, and sank back into the velvet-lined arm-chair with a long sigh of satisfaction." (The Sign of [the] Four HERE). Also see History Today (HERE).

- "the cachou box presented to him by a Russian Grand Duke":

  "Cachous are small scented tablets for sweetening the breath. They first appear to have come on the scene in the last quarter of the nineteenth century . . ." (Oxford Reference HERE).

- "his pamphlet upon cigar ash in the other":

  "I found the ash of a cigar, which my special knowledge of tobacco ashes enabled me to pronounce as an Indian cigar. I have, as you know, devoted some attention to this, and written a little monograph on the ashes of 140 different varieties of pipe, cigar, and cigarette tobacco." ("The Boscombe Valley Mystery" HERE).

- For a thorough list of Sherlock Holmes pastiches and parodies, go to Sherlock Holmes Pastiche Characters (HERE).

- A few other Holmes pastiches and parodies on ONTOS:

  ~ Sherlock Holmes (HERE)

  ~ Sherlock Holmes (HERE)

  ~ Sherlock Holmes (HERE)

  ~ "an old and very famous gentleman who has never lived and will never die" (HERE)

  ~ Mycroft Holmes (HERE)

  ~ Spurlock (HERE)

  ~ Carlock Bjones (HERE)

  ~ Shylock Bones (HERE)

  ~ and Solar Pons (HERE).

- We first met Merlin O'Moore, one of Bertram Atkey's series characters, a few years ago in "The Affair at the Closed Hotel" (HERE).

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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