Monday, May 24, 2021

"It Was Fascinating To Watch Really, the Way All Those Tentacles Curled Up and Folded Away"

"The Landlord."
By Delia Leslie (?-?).
Illustrated by John Bolton (born 1951; HERE and HERE).
First appearance: Science Fiction Monthly, September 1974.
Reprints page (HERE).
Short short short story (1 page).
Online at (HERE).

     "Er, now this is where we get to the part I really feel very embarrassed about telling you. Maybe it wouldn't have happened if Auntie would only get proper optilens fitted instead of wearing those crazy old-fashioned glasses."

Some people—and that includes Venusians—just won't listen to reason . . . .

Main characters:
~ The apartment house manager:
  "Yes, yes, of course I realise Venus is 25 or 30 million miles away. And that just bears out what I've always said, and I'll say it again, you can't run a block of flats the way it ought to be run at that kind of distance."
~ Mr. Glmff:
  ". . . refused to listen to a word I said. Instead, he started getting nasty about those glopping Venusian cacti. Said he'd see we paid for a new lot, spacefreight charges and all, and wouldn't believe me when I explained about the neighbourhood dogs just getting curious. Well, Mr. Glmff seemed pretty upset so I said to him why didn't he come and have a look at the garden and all the plants Auntie had put in."
~ Auntie:
  "When Mr. Glmff bought this block of flats, he wanted to get Auntie out. She hasn't paid any rent for years, but he can't sue her. Protection of Senior Citizens Act you know. And Auntie knows her rights. No one pulls any wool over her eyes, I can tell you."

- According to the ISFDb (HERE), "The Landlord" is Delia Leslie's only published SFF story.

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