Down to Business

FROM TIME TO TIME different stories end up with the same title. It could be the result of repeating a commonly used phrase that might echo the stories' themes in some way. Here are two such items published eight years apart, both of which are determined to give us . . .

(1) "The Business, As Usual."

By Mack Reynolds (1917-83; Wikipedia HERE; the ISFDb HERE; and the SFE HERE).

First appearance: Fantasy and Science Fiction, June 1952.

Reprints page (ISFDb HERE).

Short short short story (4 pages).

Online at SFFaudio (HERE).

   "I'm a time traveler. They picked me to send into the future. I'm important."

WE'RE not sure that Barnum was right when he said there's one born every minute, but our story does prove there's at least one born every ten centuries . . .

Main characters:

~ The time traveler, the pedestrian, and Marget.

References:

- The title is explained (HERE; The Free Dictionary).

- "an original Al Capp" (HERE; Wikipedia).

- "the natural flow of the dimension" (HERE; Wikipedia).

Resources:

- Our last Mack Reynolds story was "The Guy Who Remembered Ahead" (HERE).

- One of the many time travel tales that we encounter which caught our eye just recently is Danny F. Santos's "Seeking Time Traveller" (HERE).

- If you want to spend some time with a time-traveling detective, there's Warren M. Salomon's Ben Hardy trilogy (HERE).

(2) "The Business, As Usual."

By Jack Sharkey (1931-92; Wikipedia HERE; ISFDb HERE; and the SFE HERE).

Illustration by Trattner (ISFDb HERE).

First appearance: Galaxy, August 1960.

Reprints page (ISFDb HERE).

Short story (9 pages).

Online at SFFaudio (HERE).

   "Okay, so what do we do?"

   "We drop an agent!"

LOCKED in a Cold War that could end with the total destruction of civilization, each side anxiously looks for some way to end the stalemate without precipitating Armageddon—and that's where Agent X-45 comes in . . .

Main characters:

~ The Secretary of Defense, the President, Jenkins, Agent X-45, and Professor Blake.

References:

- "a radar resistant airplane" (HERE and HERE; Wikipedia).

- "the Cyrillic lettering" (HERE and HERE; Wikipedia).

- "the Kremlin" (HERE; Wikipedia).

- "the Politburo" (HERE; Wikipedia).

- "the new Chief of Propaganda" (HERE; Wikipedia).

- "What do you suppose would happen to an agent that was caught . . ." One was, at just about the same time that our story saw publication (HERE; Wikipedia). 

- "little cracks in the Iron Curtain" (HERE; Wikipedia).

The bottom line:

(Click on image to enlarge.)

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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"She Hated Him with All the Slow, Quiet Force of a Slow, Quiet Nature."

TO JUDGE from all available bibliographical data, today's author could never be classified as a detective fiction author. Nevertheless, she did manage to produce in her six decades of writing at least one clever item—a prime example, by the way, of British understatement—that caught the attention of Ellery Queen (the editor) some forty years after its first publication . . .

"The Liqueur Glass."

By Phyllis Bottome (1884-1963; Wikipedia HERE; Fadedpage HERE; the ISFDb HERE; and Tablet HERE).

First appearance: The Smart Set, March 1915 (today's text).

Reprints page (ISFDb HERE).

Reprinted many times (FictionMags data):

  The Golden Book Magazine #88, April 1932

  The Evening Standard, July 21, 1934

  Argosy (U.K.), June 1942

  Suspense Stories, 1945

  Ellery Queen’s Mystery Magazine #22, May 1945

  Ellery Queen’s Mystery Magazine “Overseas Edition for the Armed Forces” #22, May 1945

  Alfred Hitchcock’s Fireside Book of Suspense, 1947

  Handbook for Poisoners, 1951

  Alfred Hitchcock Presents: 14 Suspense Stories to Play Russian Roulette By, 1964

  13 Ways to Kill a Man, 1965

  Ms. Mysteries, 1976

  Masterpieces of Mystery: Stories Not to Be Missed, 1978

  Murder by the Glass, 1994

  Saved by the Belle, 2013

  Before Black Mask, 2013

  Homefront Horrors, 2016

  Brave Women, 2022.

Short short story (7 pages as a PDF).

Online at Fadedpage (HERE) and The Luminist Archives (HERE; go to text page 75).

   "She was not in the least touched by the sight of her wedding ring. Her marriage had been an accident, one of those accidents that happened frequently twenty years ago, and which happen, though more seldom, now. An unhappy blunder of ignorance, inexperience and family pressure."

WHENEVER a wife gets fed up with her husband, her options for dealing with the situation would seem to be virtually without limit. What to do? That's self-evident. How to do it? Well, there is a solution that women have been employing for centuries to deal with refractory men, and today's character decides it's finally time to use it . . .

Principal characters:

~ Mrs. Henry Watkins, Henry Watkins, Hetty and Paul, and the Vicar. 

References:

- "she did not really see St. Peter or notice his sleight-of-hand preoccupation with the fish" (Wikipedia HERE and HERE).

- “Oh, God, Our Help in Ages Past” (Wikipedia HERE).

- "Jael’s reception of Sisera" (Wikipedia HERE and HERE).

- "sloe gin" (Wikipedia HERE).

- "death by misadventure" (Wikipedia HERE).

Resources:

- Phyllis Bottome's contributions were capsulized by The Spectator:

  "In her 60-year career she published 33 novels, several of them bestsellers, short stories, essays, biographies and memoirs. She lectured widely in Britain and America. She was translated into nine languages. Her 1937 novel The Mortal Storm predicted the horrific consequences of Fascism. MGM made a film of it, starring James Stewart — the studio’s first openly anti-Nazi film. It premiered in America in 1940, just as Hitler’s troops entered Paris, and was arguably influential in persuading the US to abandon its isolationist stance." — The Spectator (from Fadedpage)

  There's more about The Mortal Storm (HERE Wikipedia).

- We've lost count of how many detecfic stories involve poisonings; here are just a random few:

  Jean-Toussaint Samat's "Murder à la Carte" (HERE)

  Max Afford's "Poison Can Be Puzzling" (HERE)

  Bernard Capes's "The Poison Bottle" (HERE)

  Arthur B. Reeves's "The Curio Shop" (HERE)

  Ralph Durand's "The Carlton Theater Mystery" (HERE)

  H. G. Wells's "The Thumbmark" (HERE)

  . . . and Steve Fisher's "If Christmas Comes" (HERE).

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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"Zlat Was the Best Novaship Pilot in the 81 Galaxies."

IT'S always a capital mistake to attempt to explain what a satirist is up to, and so we will forgo that capital mistake and offer no comments about any of this:

(1) "Twenty-Four Hours in a Princess's Life, with Frogs."

By Don White (?-?; ISFDb HERE).

First appearance: Fantasy and Science Fiction, October 1962.

Reprints page (ISFDb HERE).

Short short short story (4 pages).

Online at SFFaudio (HERE).

   "Petunia looked down at the little green creature . . ."

Main characters:

~ Princess Petunia, Princess Charming, Princess Rapunzel, Princess Aurora, Princess Beauty, the King, the Queen, Leda, and the Frog.

(2) "Peggy and Peter Go to the Moon."

By Don White (?-?).

First appearance: Fantasy and Science Fiction, February 1963.

Reprints page (ISFDb HERE).

Short short short story (3 pages).

Online at SFFaudio (HERE).

   "Shut up, and kiss me quick."

Main characters:

~ Peggy, Peter, Nanny, cook, and Professor Love.

(3) "Watch the Bug-Eyed Monster."

By Don White (?-?).

First appearance: Fantasy and Science Fiction, May 1963.

Reprints page (ISFDb HERE).

Short short short story (5 pages).

Online at The Luminist Archives (HERE; go to text page 86).

   "He must be found and removed."

Main characters:

~ Zlat, Valerie-Vernon, Truth-commander Queeg, and Slageep.

Typo: "came out of the wrap" (warp).

Resources:

- One thing's for sure, Don White wasn't long-winded (FictionMags data: vi = vignette; ss = short story):

  "Twenty-Four Hours in a Princess’s Life, with Frogs," (vi) The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, October 1962 (above)

  "Peggy and Peter Go to the Moon," (vi) The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, February 1963 (above)

  "Watch the Bug-Eyed Monster," (ss) The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, May 1963 (above)

  "Woman’s Work," (vi) Redbook, August 1966

  "Under Sentence of Death," (vi) Redbook, September 1967.

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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"They'll Respect Me Down There, for Criminals Like 'Bad Men'"

"The Squealer."

By William Allen Ward (1893-1959).

First appearance: The Underworld, April 1928.

(No cover image available.)

Short short short story (2 pages).

Online at The Pulpgen Archive (HERE).

   "And did the dirty swine squeal on you?"

IN the criminal underworld it's advisable, when you're bragging, to know just what you're bragging about. Good advice for Ruben . . .

Principal characters:

~ Ruben Matthews and Shanghai Joe.

References:

- "the oak-clad sand hills of Arkansas up where the Ozarks raise their picturesque domes" (Wikipedia HERE and HERE).

- "Eureka Springs" (Wikipedia HERE).

- "you are a yegg" (Etymonline HERE) and (Wikipedia HERE).

- “moon-shinin’ or somethin’?” (Wikipedia HERE).

- "a pal who had turned state’s evidence on him" (Wikipedia HERE).

- "Crookdom’s phrases" (Wikipedia HERE; scroll down to "squeal").

Resources:

- Here's the FictionMags listing for William Allen Ward (ss = short story; vi = vignette; ts = true story):

  "The Gun Wizard," (ss) Ace-High Magazine, 1st July 1923

  "The Knob Knocker," (vi) Mystery Magazine #161, August 1, 1924

  "The Guilty Party," (ss) 10 Story Book, October 1924

  "A Front Page Story," (vi) 10 Story Book, June 1925

  "Kennedy from Boot Hill," (ss) Ace-High Magazine, 1st January 1926

  "The Fifth Ace," (ss) Lariat Story Magazine, July 1926

  "Black Jack Signs the Pledge," (ts) Lariat Story Magazine, November 1926

  "The Wisdom of Sam Lee," (ss) Complete Novel Magazine #34, February 1928

  "A Drink of Water," (ss) Complete Novel Magazine #35, March 1928

  "Coahuila Smiles," (vi) The Golden West Magazine, April 1928

  "The Squealer," (vi) The Underworld, April 1928 (above)

  "The Crime Doctor," (ss) Complete Detective Novel Magazine #1, June 1928

  "The Conquest of Jernigan," (vi) Wild West Stories and Complete Novel Magazine #40, August 1928

  "A Pair of Silk Stockings," (ss) The Underworld, August 1928

  “'Blackie' Oliver," (ss) The Golden West Magazine, March 1930

  "A Ghost in Murderer’s Row," (ss) 10 Story Book, October 1930

  "Indiana’s Departure," (ss) Overland Monthly, April 1932

  "Perfect Escape," (ss) Overland Monthly, July 1932

  "The Puma Woman," (ss) The Underworld Detective, July 1935 (online HERE; go to text page 44)

  "Anonymous," (ss) Breezy Stories, October 1940

  "Straight in the Eye," (ss) unknown date.

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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"The Battered Face of the Man He Had Just Overpowered Kept Creeping into His Consciousness"

"Renegade."

By J. Harvey Haggard (1912-2001; the ISFDb HERE; the SFE HERE; and Dark Roasted Blend HERE).

First appearance: Thrilling Wonder Stories, June 1937.

Short short short story (3 pages).

Online at The Pulpgen Archive (HERE).

   "For a moment he plummeted headlong; his universe was clouded with a strange settling pallor, like the tawny down of Her lustrous hair. A million stars enveloped it; something wrenched at every fiber of his being. He was enveloped in a flaming conflagration that materialized almost too suddenly to register the pain that tore deeply."

SHAKESPEARE assures us that "love is blind and lovers cannot see / The pretty follies that themselves commit." But for the renegade in our story, blind love will lead him way past any and all pretty follies and straight into disaster . . .

Main characters:

~ Ellord Trant, the Core Dwellers, Curtiss, Captain Kurdley, and Her.

Resources:

- Project Gutenberg has a small J. Harvey Haggard collection (HERE).

- The Pulpgen Archive has six of Haggard's titles available (HERE) and (HERE).

- A few years ago we looked at Haggard's "The Atombomb Clue" and "Round About Rigel" (HERE), with the latter reposted (HERE).

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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Two from THE SAINT (Number 2)

(1) "April in Paris."

By Ann Gilmer (W.E.D. Ross, 1912-95).

First appearance: The Saint Mystery Magazine (U.K.), December 1963.

Reprinted in The Saint Mystery Magazine, March 1964.

Short short short story (1 page).

Online at Archive.org (HERE).

   "Your honeymoon tickets, one one-way and one round trip!"

Principal characters:

~ Madame Arnel, Claude Arnel, Marie Arnel, and the bald, nervous-looking man.

Resource:

- Our story is apropos of (THIS) particular serial killer.

(2) "Tea Ceremony."

By Robert Andrea (pseudonym).

First appearance: The Saint Mystery Magazine (U.K.), April 1963.

Reprinted in The Saint Mystery Magazine, July 1963.

Short short short story (2 pages).

Online at Archive.org (HERE).

  "She could not disobey her father . . ."

Principal characters:

~ Yoshiko Inagaki, Yoshiko's father, and Donald.

Typo: "She know" (knew).

Resources:

- The tea ceremony is a very important cultural activity in Japan (Wikipedia HERE).

- It's understandable that the beverage in question was of great significance in Ellery Queen's "The Adventure of the Mad Tea Party" (HERE) and John Q. Copeland's "The Copper Tea Strainer" (HERE).

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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"You Could've Scored! Are You Out of Your Head?"

TODAY'S STORY takes the idea of blood sports to a new level . . .

"The Racer."

By Ib Melchior (1917-2015; Wikipedia HERE; the ISFDb HERE; the SFE HERE; and the IMDb HERE).

First appearance: Escapade, October 1956.

Illustrations by Ed Kysar (?-?).

Filmed as Death Race 2000 in 1975 (WARNING! SPOILERS! Wikipedia HERE), plus four derivative productions (WARNING! SPOILERS! Wikipedia starting HERE).

Notice who gets top billing and who doesn't.

Short short story (6 pages).

Online at SFFaudio (HERE).

(Parental caution: Mild profanity.)

   "The two men fought savagely for control. They were only yards from the fleeing children."

WHEN you are a professional killer, probably the last thing you'd wish for is a case of conscience . . .

Main characters:

~ Willie Connors, Hank Morowski, and Muriel.

Typo: "Oh, year" (yeah). 

Resources:

- After first publication, Ib Melchior's "The Racer" enjoyed an unusually long afterlife, making it into the movies first and then anthologies as a result (FictionMags data):

  Escapade’s Best #1, 1957.

  If This Goes On, 1965.

  Perry Rhodan #97, 1976.

  They Came from Outer Space, 1981 (HERE).

  Reel Future, 1994 (HERE; borrow only).

  Ackermanthology! 1997, as "Deathrace 2000" (HERE; borrow only).

  Death on Wheels, 1999.

  Science-Fiction Classics: The Stories That Morphed Into Movies, 1999 (HERE; borrow only).

- Is it possible for an entire society to become pathological? Ray Bradbury imagined it in Fahrenheit 451 (WARNING! SPOILERS! Wikipedia HERE) and "The Crowd" (HERE), and 

so did Robert Sheckley in "Seventh Victim" (HERE).

- Some of you will remember a previous encounter with Ib Melchior (HERE).

The bottom line:

Unless otherwise noted, all bibliographical data are derived from The FictionMags Index created by William G. Contento & edited by Phil Stephensen-Payne.

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